“Time to buy and time to lose 15… There’s never a wish better than this when you only got 100 years to live… Fifteen … Time to buy and time to lose yourself within a morning star”. Most kids at 15 are doing just that. We’re just living our life how we want to right now, we only have a few years to be a teenager… the years don’t last that long. Staying up nights on end, sneaking out, not doing our homework, it’s all typical for us to do because we only have 100 years to live and before we know it, these years are gone.

At 15, we’re still trying to find out who we are. We make a lot of stupid mistakes, and we learn from them. Without having these years, we would never become the wise  67 year old. It’s gone in the blink of an eye. Cherish every waking moment.

I hope that I haven’t gone through my “Glory Days” yet. Because I hope my glory days are better. The closest I have got to my glory days were when I was in 7^th grade to 8^th grade graduation. I had everything I could ask for. I had friends that were there through thick and thin. I was out every day. There wasn’t that much “drama”. I had a job that I loved with people I adored. School was easy. I became close with everyone and anyone I knew. It was great times. I reunited with my friends from my dream vacation that I had fulfilled. If it weren’t for that summer, I wouldn’t have my best friend.  There was never a day that I couldn’t find less than three things to do. I guess for now those are my glory days. But, oh, how I wish that isn’t  as good as it gets. I really hope it gets better than that.

When I get older, I have high expectations of myself. I want to be a special effects artist for the movies. One day I’ll make it big. I want a big family, since I come from a big family. It’s always more fun that way. I plan to make my dreams come true while making others come true too. Plans never work out, but hopefully it will come close. The day that happens will be my glory days. I hope I live a good life. It doesn’t really matter to me how long, as long as it’s good. I want to touch many peoples lives in a way never possible otherwise. My dreams are big… for only having a blink of an eye in time compared to our world.

current mood: thoughtful

Who are you?
. Are we friends?
. When and how did we meet?
. Do you have a crush on me?
. Would you kiss me?
. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
. Describe me in one word.
. What was your first impression?
. Do you still think that way about me now?
. What reminds you of me?
. If you could give me anything what would it be?
. How well do you know me?
. When's the last time you saw me?
. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?
. How have I affected you?
. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
. How long do you think we will be friends?
. Do you love me?
. Would you hug me?
. Physically, what stands out?
. Emotionally, what stands out?
. Do you wish I was cooler?
. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
. Am I lovable?
. What do you think my weakness is?
. Do you think I'll get married?
. What makes me happy?
. What makes me sad?
. Do you think I could kill someone?

WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF:
» I died from suicide:
» I said I liked you:
» I kissed you:
» I lived next door to you:
» I started smoking:
» I stole something:
» I was hospitalized:
» I ran away from home:
» I got into a fight and you weren't there:

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY:
» Personality:
» Eyes:
» Face:
» Hair:
» Clothes:
» Mannerisms:
» Family:

WOULD YOU:
» Be my friend?:
» Have sex with me?
» Lie to make me feel better?:
» Spread rumors about me?:
» Keep a secret if I told you one?:
» Loan me some cash?:
» Hold my hand?:
» Take a bullet for me?:
» Keep in touch?:
» Try and solve my problems?:
» Date me?:

current mood: cheerful

• Around 5 feet tall
• Bald
• Boney
• Caucasian
• Squinty eyes
• Wears Diapers
• Tends to Lure kids in with candy and rot their teeth
• Keeps a cane with him

You might think you are safe, but  you really arnt. Beware of the cane... he can do KungFo

So... today I realized tommy has been gone for one year this month =o/ its kind of sad, I miss him a lot. I wonder when he will be coming home.. –sigh- other than that I guess things are doing pretty good, I have that stupid weekly progress report thing that I’m supposed to do for school, and so far all’s good but bleh, I don’t even care about school anymore. I do but I just don’t feel like doing it.. but my friends are disappointed in me and so is my councelor, so I guess I should care and bring up my grades and such for them because “I helped them see they could do it” and now they are doing a lot better, so that is good.. but ya, I’m going to go now.. kind of late, homework to do hm. Goodnight <3 always, Corinne

Simple vs. Real

A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears

A simple friend doesn't know your parents first names.
A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.

A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and stays late to help you clean.

A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why it took you so long to call.

A simple friend seeks to talk with you about your problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.

A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail you with it.

A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real friend opens the refrigerator and helps himself.

A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend knows that it's not a friendship until after you've had a fight.

A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!

A simple friend listens to you complain and gossips to others.
A real friend listens to you complain and empathizes.

A simple friend notices that your house is a mess.
A real friend helps you clean it.

A simple friend tolerates your children.
A real friend welcomes them into their homes and their lives.

A simple friend says they will pray for you.
A real friend prays with you.

A simple friend tells you about a great book they read.
A real friend sends it to you.

A simple friend sends you a sympathy card.
A real friend comes and cries with you.

A simple friend wonders how you're doing.
A real friend calls to find out.

A simple friend says, "We should get together some time."
A real friend asks, "What days are you available?"

A simple friend invites you over when it's convenient.
A real friend opens the door anytime.

A simple friend questions your motives.
A real friend tries to understand them.

A simple friend tells you about a great place to visit.
A real friend takes you there.

current mood: blah

So I was reading things people where saying the other day.. and this girl stephanie pulled up this song.. its Everybody's free (to wear sunscreen) by Baz Luhrmann and part of it goes like this.. so true, read it <3

Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents,
you never know when they’ll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings
they are the best link to your past
and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go,
but for the precious few you should hold on.
Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle
because the older you get,
the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Well that was it. Thanks for reading..

Hmm.. sometime I will post pictures yes, bye loves <3

"behind everything painful, there is something beautiful"

current mood: cheerful

Hey babes,

Tonight started as the worst day.. ever, then it turned out to be really really good in the end.. I seriously CANT wait till Dec. it will be one of the best times of my life.. –sigh- it feels so good.. so next Friday is julies birthday I’m happy for her ILH… yes.. and I don’t really know what else

If any of you want to go downtown with me in December feel free to call me, you know I wont turn you down if I don’t have too <3

895-7417

Love always,

 Corinne

current mood: happy

Wow… the last 3 days, I don’t even know. I have been so.. sad  I miss so many people, I think I am just over reacting. My mom thinks I hate her, everyone is fighting, I miss all of my old friends, I miss the nights I used to stay outside with them and just watch the sky. I miss staying up till 3 am on the phone, and going out to woodhaven and staying up for 3 days and not caring. I miss my friends liking eachother, I miss everyone when they DIDN’T do drugs. I miss it all. I know how great I had it. I want it back. I want my family to get along, in which they don’t. I hate growing up. I just wish.. it would end now and time would stop.

"A darkened corner is what I call home"

current mood: indescribable

The past two days… just haven’t been that great at all.. I just don’t know what to do anymore =o/ my family is fighting again (dad and sis) and it is just frustrating me gah… I miss how it used to be even if I was the left out kid… I liked it so much better when they all got along, and now.. it just  sucks. I want to get out of here, and have everything go back to how it used to be. I  really don’t know anymore. I called two of my best friends the first didn’t answer and I really didn’t want to call the second and ruin her and her boyfriends night =o/… she told me not to hesitate to call.. but I don’t know.. I am just not going to care anymore… maybe that way I wont have to worry about everything, and everything will be ok.

Well I’m out… talk to you some other time =o/ <3

“I paint my smile on, Just so I don’t have to explain the way I feel inside.”

current mood: sad

So today was a pretty good day, I was running late at first and looked like crap but eh o well good day. A lot of fun stuff… this boy chris that I talk to had a good day and it made me really happy.. and then I made this picture for this guy ben.. he’s a really cool guy.. I duno I made it last night

 I dont even have photoshop... i thought it was alright? it was a poem he wrote... i like it alot alot

But hrm I cant wait til Halloween. I get to see leah and stuff =o) yey!!!

I'm going to try to keep updating this i;; ttyl Lyl XoXo, Always, Corinne

So today was going great, school wasn’t too bad. Kinda fun actually… a lot of fun. Then I went downtown with Sexay Nikki, and hung out with her for a few hours… I came home then hung out with my cousins and family and stuff… and my cousin did spongebob for my voicemail.. I was so happy..

I came home around 12, and came in my room and stuff.. and my sis strolls in around 12:10 from work… shes crying… and then she starts talking to my mom and then she starts yelling and mal starts crying and yelling and then its been going on till now… its 1:01 now… and they’re still at it… =o(

I guess what happened is.. my sister has been working at this place called home run in pizza.. and her and her manger are really close, like he calls her and stuff and they are good friends... and tonight this girl sharon (one of the other managers and my mom and dads friend) threatend this guy... and said all this stuff to him.. and he told my sister that he cant talk to her anymore... because it can ruin his job, and she really likes him as a friend.. and hes getting in trouble because he talks to her

So now my sisters sad.. and I’m sad.. and I don’t know what to do…

I put my headphones on and put it up as loud as it can go =o( I don’t want to hear it anymore… it makes me sad…

I can never have one great day =o(

Life’s so screwed up latley.. I don’t know what to do anymore… my best friend is getting involved in all the wrong things, and ditching me for drugs.. I miss her so much… she claims she doesn’t like her friends and she wants to get away from them,.. but calls me when somethings wrong or when  they ditch her and I help her to stop crying.. I honestly don’t know what to do.. I love her so much and I hate watching drugs do this to her =o(.. I don’t get to see her much anymore either because I work… I know if I saw her she wouldn’t be doing half of the stupid shit shes been doing lately… im so frusturated… I really wish I could help, I don’t want to see her fuck up her life, or anything… her mom and I are trying to figure something out.. I really wish she could realize what shes been doing lately… shes seen what happens to people that do them, and hates what it does to them… why is she getting involved now? =o/…

Im sorry, it seems as though most of the times I write in here its when im in a really good mood, mad, or sad… =o/ ill try to write other days..

Until then ill try to keep my head up,

Love Always, Corinne

“where do u turn when the past is all you need....but the future's nothing to look forward to...”

“You're the only one who
Knows exactly what I mean”

I really want to talk to Patrick.. but I don’t want to call him because it seems like I always call him when something goes wrong =o/ I don’t know who else I could even talk to.. this sucks… I need to stop asking people to help me =o/

current mood: sad

Nights I wont remember and friends I’ll never forget

Ive been thinking a lot lately.. and I decided to write something about myself… here it goes

My name is Corinne, most people call me Cori. A lot of my “friends” come to me for their problems, but yet I have no one to ever go to with mine. I’m afraid to open up to most people. I love listening to people, and I love talking to people. I try to remember anything and everything about a person… I could probably give u a biography on most of my friends, but if u asked them anything about me practically they wouldn’t be able to tell you anything… because they just don’t know. They don’t know my favorite color nor my favorite food. Nor whom I like. They might be able to tell you who they think I like, or whom I “despise”… I really don’t dislike anyone… I love and dislike people in general… but really just the things we do. I used to have a somewhat “Cool” life, but lately.. it seems as though I have no friends, and I don’t talk to half of the ones I used to… I guess this is what high school does to you. Most of my friends don’t contact me anymore, I contact them.. it kind of makes me sad at a point, considering if someone wants to be a part of your life, they’ll make an effort to be in it. Most people In my life are getting involved with stupid things that they should be. But, I’m used to it, and I understand there is nothing that I can do about it, that hurts more then ever. People say I care too much, I’m far to nice. You can never be “too” nice. But maybe I am. I hardly ever say no, and if u ask me for something I normally give it to you. I like two people, but I say I don’t, because then if I say I don’t maybe I can lie to myself into believing I don’t… kind of pathetic, but that’s what I do to myself. I also have the problem in believing no one could EVER like me, so when people say they do, I don’t believe them. I say ok, but I still believe it’s a lie. I am the outcast of my family.. and I’m not half as close to them as my sister is… sometimes I wish I was, but people ignore me… so I see no point in even trying. Everyone’s been ignoring me lately, so I’ve stopped talking, well not totally stopped but a lot less then I used to. I miss talking to everyone… but there is nothing I can do about it anymore… I love you all, and if I could express it in words how much I care for you… I would, but I cant. So I wont. I will never stop caring for anyone, and I will always be there for you.

If you ever want to talk, Call me… Love ya lots, Always, Corinne

773 895*7417

" when helping others use your head... when helping yourself use your heart" - elanore roosevelt

current mood: curious

Bah tonight.. kinda boring kinda fun, I duno headacheing..

All of my good friends seemed to have forgotten about me tonight, once again.. shows how much they care =o/… but ANYWAYS…

Tomarrow im going to the Tobey Keith concert, ya that’s right I don’t care what your gona say about it… im gona have fun! Yey… I wish I could have went with mal to warped tour … but ya gnight sweetdreams

it will b Okey
tomorrows another day tonight is already the past
everything will eventually turn out for the best~-- Me

current mood: lethargic